Baby anythings are better than grown anythings


puppies     tiny sloth

baby elephant

baby owl

Right?

Well, don’t look at that last one. That is death personified, with a hint of bird.

But the other pictures (the ones that are not death personified, bird-like or no) are adorable. I’m not saying that animals can’t be cute when they’re grown, but no one prefers the adult version of anything over the cuddly squishy baby version.

There may be one person out there who disagrees with the last statement. That person (I use “person” loosely) hates babies and all things adorable. Shun that person from your life and your community. Let me be clear: I’m not advocating violence here. All I am saying is that tarring and feathering has been out of fashion long enough to make a retro come-back, like leggings or ironic sayings on T-shirts or waterboarding. Just keep an open mind.

In conclusion, anything in baby-shape is better than anything in grown-shape. We are biologically driven to like baby-shapes, so don’t feel guilty when you decide to abandon or euthanize the sweet mischievous puppy your brought home once it has turned into a creature roughly the size and appearance of a Tauntaun. I’m not even making this shit up; this shit is science (the biological-liking-of-babies part, not the part about Tauntauns).

Look at the pictures below of the same types of animals as above, but now in grown-shapes:

terrifying dog     ugly sloth

angry elephant   evil eagle

Exactly.

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By the way, why do baby birds look like this? This tiny eagle must be a Jim Henson muppet… maybe a Skeksis by way of Fraggle Rock?

jim henson eagle

(Does anyone actually get my references, btw?)

2 thoughts on “Baby anythings are better than grown anythings

  1. I love the way you wear your heart on your sleeve. That refers to all your writing – not specifically this one. Understand that I am less familiar with some references and other commonalities in your world since my world is distant and different in many ways. But diversity is a good thing too!

    • Of course, and I use a lot of personal references too haha just to make it more difficult on everyone! Thank you, Margie, I really appreciate your sweet words.

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